Geek Chic: X-Men Boreagins: Wolverine

April 12, 2011

X-Men Origins: Wolverine

Did we really need such an uneccesarily long name? Where people going to think it was documentary about actual wolverines with out the X-Men part?



Coming Soon, to a theater near you!!!




I was actually kind of stoked about this movie at one point. The first X-Men movie was great and the second is one of my all time favorite superhero films. (yeah there was a third one, but well…I’ll save that for another day, let’s just say I was disappointed and move on)



Brett Ratner's take on the X-Men.




There were certainly enough source material for a good Wolverine solo movie. Frank Miller and Mark Millar’s respective runs on the book come immediately to mind.




I mean the guy is like 3 or 4 hundred years old, there’s enough fodder in there for like, 10 Wolverine movies. He’s been around for the American Revolution, the Civil War, the Vietnam War, World War I and II, one of those would have made a good back drop. What’s that you say, they cover that in the first 10 minutes of the movie. Well who says war is a good back drop for a movie? Steven Speilberg, Robert Zemecks, George Lucas (if you count the Clone Wars)



My container of movies worse than Attack of the Clones.




, Oliver Stone…I really can go on. They do attempt to follow the Origin miniseries that Paul Jenkins had written but they boil that miniseries down to like 7 minutes on film. At least they act like they wanted to respect the source material. Ultimately I think when it became a franchise is when the movies started going downhill, similar to what happened to the Alien series. Fox had very little faith in either of these movies.







In the theater, no one can hear you snore.




They actually had only projected the 1st X-Men movie to make around 100 million so when it made 150 million domestic, I’m sure they thought it was just a fluke. Likewise to the success of the 1st Alien. The 2nd film in the series went on to be even larger success than the first and are some of the few instances when sequels are actually better that the first. This is when the studio I’m sure took all the credit for the films and started sharing ideas for the sequels. Words like spunky, hip kid side kick, with a skateboard or backwords hat(cause kids like those.) gay jive talking robot and/or anything that will translate well into a toy. Alien3 and X-Men: The Last Stand may not have been total bastardizations of their predecessors, but they certainly had been diluted by studio input. X-Men Origins: Wolverine and Alien Resurrection both made less than the previous films and cost considerably more. Does anyone really think the 4th films in these respective series where the best. If you are raising your hand please put it down at this point because you are a moron and we don’t need to talk…at all…ever.



X-Men Origins key demographic.




I say all this to make the point that a Wolverine movie had so much potential. The inclusion of Ryan Reynolds as Deadpool was absolute brilliant casting…unfortunately he’s in the movie for like fifteen minutes and when he shows up at the end his mouth is sewn shut. That’s right F(*&iING DEADPOOL CAN’T TALK IN THE LAST 10 MINUTES OF THE MOVIE. The Merc with a mouth, known for his witty banter and repartee, is neutered essentially. It’s like giving the Dukes of Hazard an orange Power Wheels. Sure it might vaguely resemble the General Lee but in the end it is not. Same way with the Wolverine movie. Hugh Jackman looks like the Wolverine from X2 but at the end of the day this just seems like a bad, long deleted scene with a ton of cameos. Snikit, Snikit, Snore.



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